Monday, May 12, 2014

Come To Jesus

FYI, I started this post about a month ago. For various reasons, mostly involving a paper and presentation for my class, it's been unfinished until now. All the points then are still valid points now.

Actual Easter card to my sister.
 She found it funny.
My parents did not.
(Funny cause it's ultra religious
(which I am not),
not because it's an AA Jesus.
I didn't even notice that when I purchased it.)
I'm about to have a "Come to Jesus" convo with myself. For sooooo many reasons. Let me list them....
1)Weight: Holy shit people! I'm back to where I started 1.5 years ago. I blame this on a couple of things but mostly my will power. It's been practically non existent since October 2013. I have had very little motivation to run since the RnR 1/2 in October. And my will power to say "no" to pies, cookies, cake....oh chocolate cake...well, I haven't said no to a lot since October either. To combat this I have joined Weight loss for Warriors. I'm only a week or two in so I haven't seen much progress. But the last time I did a challenge it worked out pretty well.

2)Running/Crossfit: As stated above it's been tough. The winter here was terrible and I had a difficult time getting out of bed to run in the FREEZING temps. And, I left my crossfit gym to go it alone at a less expensive regular gym. It's not been going well. I've done some work outs but it's been spotty. I'm hoping since I'm done with my class and the temps are warmer I can jump back in. I've already finished my annual Flying Pig 10K and am using it as a spring board!

3) Whiskey: Oh Dear. We're still dating but I'm just so torn on so many issues. We are complete opposites in almost everything. The ones I'm most concerned with are politics and our parenting styles (should it ever come to that). Sometimes I feel like I'm Chandler and just looking for things to pick at (see first minute of following video). But, then sometimes I feel these are valid issues. Do I have a fear of commitment? Our time lines for things do not line up. No body in his circle except for a few(3) friends knows about me. If he dies, I'll never know! He's not really pushing the separation/divorce. I get that he wants to give his ex time to get her shit together but when he said a possible 2 years I was floored and hopefully made it clear that I probably wouldn't be sticking around for that amount of time. Especially, if I'm still "secret."

4) Whiskey finding out about this site: He made a statement a couple of weeks ago that he googled me and found some sites of mine. I was a bit worried he found this one and pushed to hear what they were. Apparently, just my linkedin, facebook, and researchgate profiles. I suppose that would have been a good time to tell him about this site but until I decide on the question of us being an us I'll just keep it locked away.

5)Money: It's always money. I took a class this semester to save money. I gave up my parking to save money. I gave up my crossfit to save money. And yet, it doesn't seem like enough. I have been able to pay off a couple of cards over the past couple of months but then I needed to do shit on my house this weekend and just added to my Home Depot card. It's a vicious vicious circle. I'm hoping to consolidate at the end of summer and if it goes well, I should be clear in 2 years.


Running Meg said...

I had a different blog when I was dating my now husband and still never told him about it. This just reminded me of that.

Good luck with your warrior weight loss challenge!

CLE Runner said...

I was just catching up on yours! Glad your leg is feeling better.