Friday, September 4, 2015

Brownie Points

I am dating (in the loose sense of the word) George Clooney!

Ok, not the real George but close enough he could pass for his pudgier brother. According to him I am not the first person to think this. On the first date George wanted to take a selfie. I find this odd, my friends find it cute. The date itself was ok. Obviously, he's attractive. He's funny. Attentive. But the date itself had an interview feel to it with rapid fire questions. He kisses well, though.

48 hours later found me on a second date with him. Let me say that again FOURTY EIGHT HOURS!!
On a Tuesday. So many reservations... Maybe it was a strike while the irons hot sort of thing.

 Now, you know me. I'm old, I have a routine. I wake at 5-510am to go to the gym, so I'm in bed around 9-930. Week day date nights are not my favorite but he wanted to go to FIRE and I've been dying to go there for 8 years.

Then he wanted to pick me up. More reservations! Second date, he now knows were I live. If the date goes bad I can't escape to my car and leave. The date is no longer on my time table.

Ok, breath. I can give up a little control. And I did. He picked me up. We went to dinner. I found out he has MS (not sure how I feel on this). He hasn't had a consistant job. He's still bitter about his divorce (rather fresh). He has children. That is the extent of what I know. I feel like I know nothing of substance from him. He jokes a lot, to the point where I don't know if he's joking or for real.

The real point of this post is this gem:

When we get back to my house (8:45), he pulls ALL the way up my drive and parks in front of my garage. Guys I dated for 6 months and actually stayed the night never did this! He proceeds to act like he's coming in at which point I ask what he's doing..
"aren't you going to ask me in?"
"No. It's almost 9oclock and I need to go to bed for the gym in the morning."
"oh"
We sit in the car for a few minutes, talking with the occasional kiss. He then says:
"I would just like to point out that I think I should      get some brownie points."
"You do? For what?"
"I haven't touched your boobs or grabbed your ass all night."
"So, you think you get brownie points for being a decent human being, doing what normal people would do and not being a douchebag?"
"Yes, I've been a gentleman."
"No, you're being normal and asking for "points" kind of takes away from the whole "gelntleman" thing." I hope he thinks about this. Not sure it hit home.

He then asked me to spend an evening with him sometime this weekend. And by evening he means all night, but he'll sleep in another room if I want. I've agreed to see him again, like I said I feel I don't know the true George and observing him in his natural habitat may help. I did not agree to the sleep over. The only way that is going to happen is if I get VERY drunk or he drugs me. I'm taking pepper spray.

Stay tuned!
 PS. In rereading this I'd like to make a point. In telling/asking me to stay the night ahead of time he has basically cock blocked himself. Had he just let the night play out he would have gotten a lot further. That's the trouble with some guys that I've talked to. They want to know ahead of time if they are going to get "any." That is a turn off and makes the outcome 100% no. Had they just taken me for drinks, and played the night out and been a cool decent person then the odds are 50/50.

1 comment:

Running Meg said...

Man, glad he is good looking but can you imagine saying that to someone? Like, "listen, I've been on my best behavior, I haven't touched your dick, I deserve some bonus points". Um, no.